Cycles of Change

 

Senseless: Poem

 

Senseless: Poem

She was writing

At the day and night –

Not to be heard,

Not to be hurt

But to be felt

For the wind to listen

And stars to remember.

She was writing

Her heart off

Not to show off.

It was not hard work

Or an assignment –

She was at her retirement

That made here stay young,

Fresh, and restless at tung.

Is it old and senseless?

Tomshinsky@2025

One Thing to Carry Today: Essay

 

One Thing to Carry Today: Essay

If you were asked to carry one thing with you, what would it be? Good question. I have good enough common sense and practicality. I made more good choices in life to be proved. And a few bad ones, that cause regrets. Tell me, who does not? Nobody is perfect. I guess the question addresses priorities. Well, the priorities could be changed in certain circumstances. Inevitable self is certain about the smile of dignity and self-worth, charisma of self0insurance, confidence, and natural bravery. Maybe, it would be strength not the one from muscles but empowered by heart and kindness.

People say that old wine is better. I am not a wine drinker. But if things are better with age, I am reaching magnificence. The older I get and the more time I spend on my laptop writing, I find out that I have a lot of things in common with computers. We both started out with lots of memory and the drive, then became outdated, crashed unexpectedly, and eventually we would have to replace our parts.

Okay. Alright. On a serious note, old and senseless, age and irrational decisions are popping up. Perhaps, it is a possibility that accessibility and general mobility I must carry along. And then look, it is not the gray hair that makes you look aged, it is the full sentences and punctuation that I use writing and texting that I carry with me.

Majority of people of different ages are divided into takers and givers. Taking in positive vibes, learning and appreciating continuing education, slowly but sure. Also, excepting the reality, without any illusions, required both to take and keep physical and mental strength.

Giving and sharing both bring satisfaction of gifting, without asking anything in return. The most valuable way of giving is sharing our time and small acts of kindness; simple, spontaneous, the ones which are from the heart.

When you are surrounded by truly wonderful places, surrounded by time, and majestic nature, you will carry one thing with you: you, yourself, and your state of mind. You pray for blessings to stay safe and protected and find the strength to hold down to. Only the strong can survive.

Tomshinsky@2025

Maybe: Poem

 

Maybe: Poem

Maybe the personal journey

Is not to become anything.

Maybe unbecoming

Is everything

Like downsizing.

Just to be of what

You are and should be meant

To be, to be

You that do not bend

And always find the way

To be well-seen

As a person

With a clean soul

Keeping promises of sweet sixteen.

Maybe the journey

Needs one ticket back

With memories backpack

That leaves a track

To the road home

After the storm

Is this what the heart wants?

Tomshinsky@2025

When the Music Knows Before You Do...: Essay

 "Sometimes you find a song that makes you cry for reasons you can't name. The melody uncovers things you've hidden even from yourself. Music is a gentle thief, stealing the weight from your chest." (R.M. Drake)

When the Music Knows Before You Do...

Sometimes, without warning, a song begins—and before the second verse, your eyes are wet.

You don’t know why.

You weren’t feeling sad.

You weren’t reaching for healing.

But something in the melody finds you.

There are notes that know your story better than you do. Harmonies that slip past your defenses, reach into the locked boxes inside you, and gently open what you swore you buried. A certain lyric echoes through your chest like it’s been waiting years to be heard. You don’t understand all the reasons why, and maybe you never will—but something inside you loosens.

Music has a quiet way of asking you to feel what you've avoided. Not with force, but with grace. It doesn’t demand that you explain or solve anything. It just sits with you, wraps around your soul, and says, "It’s okay to feel this now. It’s safe to let it out."

Sometimes, a song doesn’t just play through your speakers—it plays through your soul.

It steals the ache you didn’t have words for.

It reminds you of someone you miss, or a version of yourself you left behind.

It gives shape to your sorrow and wings to your joy.

You don't need to understand every tear.

You just need to let them fall.

Because sometimes the music is the only one who truly knows what your heart has been trying to say.

Seat without Ideas and Words: Essay

 Yesterday I sat with a friend who had recently experienced a series of devastating losses. His body slumped and lifeless in his chair, his eyes welling up with tears. He talked about the pain and constriction in his chest and how he hadn't really slept in weeks. I wanted so badly to say something to take away his pain or to teach him the different emotional releasing techniques that have served me so well over the last 20 years. But I could sense that my words were not what he needed in that moment. So, I sat with him. As words periodically formed in his mouth, I sat, and I breathed with him. I breathed into my Hara, and I softened the area of my heart. I opened my senses to the room around us. Gradually, I felt his heart start to open, and I noticed his breathing deepening. He started to open up about how he was really feeling and I just sat and breathed with him. Sometimes people don't need our ideas or our words. They just need us to sit with them. And to breathe. Maybe even to breathe for them until they can catch their breath again. This is the physical labor of Zen.

1st of June

 Happy Summer, Happy June, Happy Sunday! 1st of June, please be nice, I only ask once, please bag you no hurricane damages, take it easy. Summertime to me is end of childhood that spring brings every year as shy beginnings. In summertime, we mature as adults, open to sun and rains, beach time, blooming gardens, celebration of our country birth, and summer birthdays with barbeque, long outside nights with mosquitoes. Even reading time is different in summers with destructions of birds and lizards. I love the summer dresses, sunglasses, straw handbag, and white and blue colors of summer, white pants, shorts, the freedom of summer outside activities, warm rains and dancing in the rain if caught without umbrella and roof to stay safe. Summertime brings watermelons, mangoes, local strawberries from the farms to the table, and cold water to satisfy testy buds.

Tomshinsky@2025